Doctor Rodney McKay

From the first moment I walked onto Atlantis, I felt it; the unearthly pressure of all the history of countless centuries. An entire people lived and died in this city, yet of them little record is left.

There are tantalising glimpses – the hologram Carson discovered, research labs left in states of disrepair. And the odder things like a shadow entity locked in a trap and a woman frozen in stasis.

Atlantis can be a weird place.

It presses you in some times. When I'm in its depths, in the dark, there's a weight that suffocates me just as the dust of Ancient machines long abandoned rises to choke me. It's those times common sense forsakes me and I swear their ghosts are watching.

There was a recent occurrence where it seemed Atlantis really was haunted. The whale-like creatures that live in the surrounding waters converged on the city in response to some weird animal instinct that warned them of an imminent devastating solar flare. They attempted to warm us, reserving an Ancient experiment and their ghosts walked the halls.

I didn't witness any of them, something I count as fortunate considering the descriptions those like Teyla and Ronon and Elizabeth gave. It was bad enough going back under the surface in a puddlejumper which, though I never sworn not to do again, came way too soon after the last time for my liking. That did mean Sheppard and I got a real close look at “Sam” and his mom.

However it was their sonar that caused the headaches we both suffered, and burst our eardrums. That was incredibly painful, but being deafened to their noise did stop us from seeing the projections the others on Atlantis saw.

I'm quite grateful, in a way. I have enough ghosts of my own to live with.

Picture prompt

( hand in mine )

( Staring - spoilers for Sunday )

Exhaustion. I have been exhausted more often than I’ve wanted. Pulling an all-nighter is a regular occurrence for me; usually because it’s been necessary. Protecting Atlantis is a twenty four hour job and it’s often under pressure.

The first time I discovered just how long a human being could stay awake was during the Wraith siege. There came a point where everything merged together and even now I cannot remember how many hours it was before I could finally get some sleep.

I do remember becoming bone-weary tired. I never knew a person could get so tired and still manage to keep going. It was having to keep going that drove me on. I had to do everything I could to keep the city safe.

Fortunately that kind of thing only happens once in a while, though I still think once is more than enough, to be honest.

But I have learnt the cure for exhaustion. It’s need and stubbornness and an awful lot of strong black coffee.

This is a character journal for creative_muses.

Rodney McKay belongs to MGM and no infringement of their copyright is intended.

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